(Something along the lines of ‘I’m not for sale, actually. And you’d better believe the only male sex worker to ever make an appearance in the show, Olyvar, is finally going to get some lines. In a partly-sleazy, partly-sexy scene Oberyn and Ellaria sample the bountiful buffet at LittleBucks. So, when Oberyn, Prince of Dorne and his paramour, Ellaria Sand, arrive in the capital ahead of evil bastard Joffrey’s wedding to Margery Tyrell they head straight (pun intended) for Littlefinger’s brothel (seriously, Littlefinger is the Starbucks of brothels – he’s the only game in town!) You see, dear reader, Dorne is a very progressive society: woman can inherent titles and land ahead of younger male siblings, there’s no stigma upon children born out of wedlock (as there is in the other six kingdoms) and overall, it seems to be rather sex-positive society. When swaggering Dornish prince Oberyn Martell, The Red Viper, makes his first appears during the show’s fourth season it is, rather fittingly, in a brothel. “There’s a foreign invasion underway.”Ĭritics were not kind to this moment, but fuck them – in a show that has more zombies than gay people, we’ll take our moments where we can, thanks. “What are you doing all the way over there?” she asks, sliding Yara’s legs apart. “He’ll be my advisor, my protector,” Yara says of Theon. “A boy, a girl – depends on the port” replies Yara, as Theon awkwardly shuffles off to fetch wine and grieve his lack of genitals (they had been so close, after all.) We can safely assume it won’t interrupt his writing.)Īs Yara (who, in the books, is super glam and super straight by the way), Theon and Ellaria Sand make their way to Dorne to collect soldiers for Danaerys Targarean’s planned invasion of Westeros, the gang kill time drinking sailor’s rum. That was until the first episode of Season 7, which saw stern-yet-flirty Iron Islander Yara Greyjoy ALMOST get lucky with sexy Dornish Royal Paramour (wait, is she still Royal Paramour even after Oberyn’s crushing demise? I must email GRR Martin to check. Gratuitous sexposition courtesy of Littlefinger, Roz (RIP) and random sex worker Sure, there’s always a pretty steady stream of female sex workers grinding on each other whenever the plot forces Littlefinger to elaborate on the intricacies of his schemes (theses scenes are deemed “sexposition” by critics) in his brothel, but as far as meaningful female same-sex action goes, GoT is as dry as a Braavosi’s flip flop. Oh, Renly! If only you’d convinced Ned Stark to take the throne in Season One.Ĭontext is crucial at this point there isn’t a concept of sexual orientation in the GRR Martin’s Game of Thrones world – you’re either straight, a eunuch or you’re Dornish. In one of the pair’s most enjoyable scenes, Loras channels Lady Macbeth while shaving Renly’s furry chest. He’s also ambitious, and that is what ultimately contributes to Renly’s undoing. Loras, however – number one swordsman in the whole kingdom (after sister-lover Jaime Lannister) – is sexy, swashbuckling (or whatever the medieval equivelant is) and super gay. In the book series, Renly is obviously, undeniably gay (a keen fashionista, he even designs bespoke rainbow armour for his King’s Guard), and is the butt of many jokes as a result.
Season 1 of the HBO behemoth featured just two gay characters – Loras ‘The Knight of Flowers’ Tyrell and King Robert’s baby bear of a brother, Renly Baratheon. Whenever an LGBT+ identified character appears and starts being visibly LGBT, they usually get murdered.
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